Mr. Wiggles

(this is not a pic of the actual perv)

There are always strange people on the subway. It's expected. I feel like I've seen them all. The drunk homeless man, the angry at life messed up in the head woman who thinks everyone around her is out to get her, the skitzofrenic person who is rocking back and forth repeating the same thing over and over, the subway pole dancers that are too ugly to be strippers, the drugged out woman who drops a syringe by my flip flop feet and the typical "homeless" person with the speech, "May I just have a minute of your time. I am not a drug addict. I just have fallen upon hard times. Could you find it in your hearts to...". But never have I ever been flashed before.

While traveling home, on a Monday on the D Train from 42nd Street it was a typical commute. Crowed trains, men not getting up to give you their seats, people ipods turned up too load that everyone on the train can hear them listening to Jay-Z's Empire State of Mind.
I was standing by the doors, as I like to in case there is an emergency and I need a quick escape. I get on the train at 42nd street and the train proceeds downtown. The D train is an express train so it makes limited stops and there is only one stop in between my work and home stop, 34th street.

We pull into the34th street stop and it is business as usual. It's a over busy stop due to the fact that it's at Penn Station and a lot of people get off here to commute to the LIRR or the NJ Transit to take them out of the city. I stay on the train and stand by the door as I people watch. I notice a normal looking man in his 30's standing front first close to a wall. "That's weird. I wonder what he's doing", I think to myself as I lean to the right to try to get a better look. The though goes through my mind that it looks like he is peeing. Really dude?? Peeing on the Subway platform during rush hour? Ya, you are sure to get caught.

As that thought crosses my mind I see that he is staring at me while I am staring at him. The look on his face goes from a smirk to a HUGE smile with a little of his tongue out. He slowly turns towards me and as the train doors are closing I notice that he was not peeing at all. Instead he was pleasuring himself and shakes and wiggles his "thing" right there for me to see. All with the biggest, grosses smile I have ever seen. Right there on the platform at 5pm rush hour. I let out a small scream and say "Really? Really." in the way the do on SNL in the skit, "Really! With Seth and Amy".

I was shocked and felt very violated. Did I really just see a man penis wiggling on the 34th Street platform? I thought to myself, "welcome to New New York! and now I need a shower."

SO I feel that I have almost seen it all. I was prepared for grime and grit when I moved here. I was ready to see things that would send our parents generations to an early grave. I guess I just am never ready for ALL that I do see. So pretty much you name it I have seen it or experienced it.
Man, I still LOVE this City! Mr. Wiggles and All!!